This & That

I have "this." I love this. I've always wanted this. But... then there's "that." I want that too. But I don't have that.

I tried for years to get that. Put myself though a lot to have that, and at one point I thought that was within my grasp. I thought I would have this and that. But then that was taken and I was left wondering if I would have the opportunity to have that again.

I put that on the back burner and decided to focus on this. Part of me feels like this will suffer and be neglected if I put much more effort in to that. Shouldn't I be grateful for what I do have? Shouldn't I put my all into this? This is here. This is a gift. This deserves my best.

But what about that? I want this to have that, more than I want that for myself. I feel like this would go well with that. I worry that this could resent me for not doing what I can to get that too.

I fear I may regret not trying again to have that. I don't want this to get the shaft while I'm trying to have that. I am eternally grateful for this. Don't really know what I would do with out this.

(Borrowed from my sweet friend Cassie...her meaning and mine are completely different but, the sentiment is exactly the same.)